YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE

PEOPLE AROUND - A MIRROR TO ONESELF

Many a times we grumble and complaint that no one loves us, no one gives consideration to us and no one cares for us. Have we ever thought that the people around us are a reflection of us?  When you complain that you never get a visitor to your home or no one comes to visit you in hospital, have you asked yourself whether you have visited any home, or hospital.  Have we ever realized that depending on our face’s expression, those who come across respond?  To know whether you have a happy face, look at the face of the other person that comes opposite of you.  If he/she smiles, that means you have a smiling face. If, still with your smiling face, some one looks grouchy or melancholic remember that the one who comes opposite of you must either be preoccupied with something in his/her mind and have not noticed you or he/she is mentally sick. He/she needs your compassionate care.  Smile when you see another person coming near you - give this a try - you will see the difference.  I also have noticed that once we smile at someone, we ourselves receive a positive energy and it lingers in us for a few more seconds; if not a few minutes.  It becomes a habit eventually and it shall transform your character.

Once there was a mad woman who believed that her body was composed of celestial matter and not of gross earthly stuff.  She often used to say that in beauty and perfection her body had no equal on earth.  One day they brought her a full-length mirror and she saw her own reflection.  She was so enraged that she threw a chair at the mirror, breaking it into a thousand pieces.  Then she heaved a great sigh of relief.  When they asked her why she had broken the mirror, she replied that she had done so because the mirror wanted to spoil her beauty by trying to transform her heavenly body into an earthly one.

      Family and friends are mirrors that reflect your real self.  Breaking the mirror is stupid, and so is renouncing the world.  You have to transform yourself, not the mirror.  And this transformation can happen where you are right now.  Revolution begins at the centre.  Trying to start it on the periphery is a sheer waste of time.  You have to start with yourself.  Your family and friends are not standing on your way.  If anyone is standing on your way, it is you. 

DON’T QUIT BUT CONQUER

When the untoward and unexpected things happen in our lives, the tendency is to succumb to it and quit. Quitters can never win and winners shall never quit.  The circumstances that tempt us to quit can be made a means to gain resistance power to go forward in life.  It can be made an opportunity to gain stamina to conquer.  Always remember that the clouds come as a flash and goes off whereas the sun remains and it shall re-appear after a few minutes.  Patience is what is needed always. 

Following is a beautiful poem for you to ponder and be encouraged.

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, 

When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill, 

When the funds are low and the debts are high, 

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, 

When care is pressing you down a bit, 

Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns, 

As every one of us sometimes learns, 

And many a failure turns about, 

When he might have won had he stuck it out; 

Don’t give up though the pace seems slow– 

You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than 

It seems to a faint and faltering man, 

Often the struggler has given up, 

When he might have captured the victor’s cup, 

And he learned too late when the night slipped down, 

How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out– 

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, 

And you never can tell how close you are, 

It may be near when it seems so far, 

So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit– 

It’s when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit.

                                                                                            (Author unknown)

You can communicate your opinions with me via email: gvkallumpuram@gmail.com

SERVANTS ARE HUMAN BEINGS

How do we treat our servants – as fellow human beings or even meaner than the pet animals of our homes?  When we go up in the social and economic ladder of life, what we look for are servants to help us at our home.  Depending on the ‘status’, the number of servants also increases.  Have we ever thought that we are becoming dependent to them and thereby becoming helpless and hapless?  We become so dependent to them that we cannot survive without them.  Have we thought that we should be obliged to them rather than them thankful to us because they can live without us but we cannot live without them?  We have to remember that our money is of no use if they are not available for our service. We have to bear in mind, once we become dependent on them: If not we, they may have someone else, but if not they who shall be for us – not even our children shall be of help to us at the time of need.

Arrogance towards the servants and ill-treating even to the extent of  physical torture is very common in many of the houses and seems to be on the rise (I am aware and also acknowledge that there are masters/mistresses who treat the servants with honor and consider them as fellow humans).   We read and see through mass media the incidents of ill treatment to the maid-servants even by the so-called ‘educated’ and ‘cultured’ and even ‘religious’.  The result of education should be broadening our mind to accept the other, the sign of culture should be to include the other as part of ourselves and outcome of religion should be seeing God in the other. If not, then we are not educated, cultured and religious. It is beyond on iota of doubt that a servant should be treated with dignity and our treatment should bring in them a pride to serve the fellow human beings who are in real need. 

The reason I write this is because of a short film I have seen on Face Book (https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=442476422507951).  Could you end seeing it without a drop of tear in your eyes or at least a disturbance in your mind?  If yes, you have lost the humaneness and has thereby stopped to be a human being. 

You can communicate your opinions with me via email: gvkallumpuram@gmail.com

THINK BEFORE YOU SAY AND ACT

We never think of the consequences of our hurting words and haughty bout of reactions even to petty and silly things.  We never think before we say, act or react to the untoward incidents that happen in our lives. When our ego is hurt, we become blind.  Hurt ego makes us demons.  Many a times that which happens as a result of hurt ego is irrevocable actions and reactions.  Hence we are to be very careful and should think before we act and react.  “…let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath …” advises St. James in the Bible (James 1:19).   

I wish to give two incidents to which I am a witness.  When I was posted to a new parish as its Vicar, on the first Sunday of my taking charge, after the Holy Communion Service, a note was given to me as I was coming out to make the announcement.  The note mentioned that a particular person passed away.  I lost my temper but did not react at that time.  I started the announcement that so and so passed away after which I was thinking of adding, “Is this the tradition of this Church?  Why no one let me know of the death before hand”.  But as I announced the name of the person, someone in the first pew asked, “How did you come to know of it?” He then added, “He was staying alone in the house.”  I profusely thanked God for not reacting too soon. 

I was a witness to the second incident.  During a baptism ceremony, the officiating person was offended because when he came out for the sacrament, he saw a lady sitting in the first pew (Our Church tradition is that when the priest comes out from the holy of the holies – we name it madbaha – the congregation is supposed to stand).  Being hurt because of the ‘disrespect’ he announced that everyone should stand during the worship.  The lady sitting in the front did not respond.  The priest shouted and said, “I have told everyone to stand.  You are not supposed to sit during the worship.  Those who cannot stand should go the back of the Church.”  When this is shouted out, the person sitting in the front went to the back row.  After the Service was over, the person came to me crying.  I found that that lady had come directly from the Cancer Care Centre travelling about 150 kms  just to attend her granddaughter’s baptism. She could not stand because of the chemotherapy she has undergone. If only the person who officiated thought that there must be some reason for her to sit! He could have asked, “Why are you sitting?” or ignored thinking himself that there must be some reason!

People make mistakes.  But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Pause and ponder.  Think before you act.  Be patient and try to understand.

You can communicate your opinions with me via email: gvkallumpuram@gmail.com