WHAT CONTROLS YOU?

Three factors that control our personality are our gene, circumstances and willpower. 

We have no control over our gene.  Whatever we have inherited from our father and mother through their gene cannot be changed by natural means (I am not sure whether it can be doctored – if someone who reads this know something, please enlighten me and the other readers who happen to see this post). It is inherited and the traits of the ancestors are naturally transferred – in some cases the paternal gene, in some other cases the maternal gene, or, in still other cases it may be a mix of both in control of our lives.  The problem is that we become a slave to the influences of the gene.

To a certain extent, we do not have control over our circumstances as well, especially during our childhood days.  Many a times it is given and we grow in it. It plays a major role on the development of our personality. We tend to blame our circumstances for the kind of personality we are; but the fact is that many a times we succumb to our conditioning. 

We know the dictum, “if there is a will, there is a way”.  To add to this is the saying, “if there is no way, make a way”.  Hence the foremost in the development of our personality is our own wish that gives us the willpower that works for the better – in fact the best we can achieve. Dale Carnegie in his training program gives 7 secrets of personal development.  They are:  

1.     Only you can take charge of your personal development.

2.   Development is a personal process.

3.   Success often occurs in places where you least expect it.

4.   Focus on the little things around you, not just the bigger picture.

5.    Improving your listening skills will make you a better communicator.

6.   Never stop learning new skills and practicing basic one.

7.    Success starts with failure and is a “trial and error” process.

Do not be a slave to both gene and circumstances, but take the gene to your advantage the maximum possible, make the circumstances to your best use possible (not in the selfish and ulterior sense) and look for opportunities to develop your personality the best way possible. Be reminded often that “if there is a will, there is a way” and if there is no way, be determined to make a way – so resolute that you leave no stone unturned to make it a reality.  As Martin Luther King Jr. has said, “You cannot keep birds from flying over your head, but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair.”