KNOW THE WHY AND WHAT OF YOUR DOING

It is reported that an experiment was conducted in U.K. with eight monkeys.

They put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room was a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling.

Each time a monkey tried to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which made them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempted to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys was then removed, and a new monkey was put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, it wondered why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious. But undaunted, he immediately began  to climb the ladder.

All the other monkeys fell upon him and beat him silly. He had no idea why.

However, he no longer attempted to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey was removed and replaced. The newcomer attempted to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammered the crap out of him.

This included the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he’s not on the receiving end this time, participated in the beating because all the other monkeys were doing it. However, he had no idea why he was attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys were replaced. Eight new monkeys were now in the room. None of them had ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempted to climb the ladder. All of them enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tried, without having any idea why.

And that is how traditions and systems get established and followed. Are we following the traditions and systems blindly, without knowing the why and what behind it?

Think twice before following a tradition or system. It will many a times help not to make a mockery of our faith expressions.  It would make more sense to an outsider.

MY WIFE DOES NOT WORK!

A husband had the following conversation with his psychologist once:

P: What do you do for a living?

H: I work as an Accountant in a Bank.

P: Your Wife?

H: She doesn’t work. She’s a Housewife only.

P: Who makes breakfast for your family in the morning?

H: My Wife, because she doesn’t work.

P: At what time does your wife wake up for making breakfast?

H: She wakes up at around 5 am because she cleans the house first before making breakfast.

P: How do your kids go to school?

H: My wife takes them to school, because she doesn’t work.

P: After taking your kids to school, what does she do?

H: She goes to the market, then goes back home for cooking and laundry. You know, she doesn’t work.

P: In the morning before you go for the work, what do you do?

H: I am so tired that I get up late in the morning! Then before I go to work, I read the newspaper and watch the morning news!

P: In the evening, after you go back home from office, what do you do?

H: Take rest, because I’m tired due to all day works. I need some change; hence I watch a movie or some other program in the T.V.

P: What does your wife do then?

H: She prepares meals, serving our kids, preparing meals for me and cleaning the dishes, cleaning the house then taking kids to bed.

Whom do you think works more, from the story above? Do the husbands everywhere see themselves in this story?

The daily routines of your wife commence from early morning to late night!  Is that called ‘DOESN’T WORK’?

Yes, being housewives do not need Certificate of Study, even High Position, but their ROLE/PART is very important!

Appreciate your wife because their sacrifices are uncountable. This should be a reminder and reflection for all of us to understand and appreciate each other’s roles.

"LET US HANG TOGETHER OR HANG SEPARATELY!"

A company organized a seminar for its employees. The trainer invited ten volunteers to the stage and handed over a balloon to each one. He asked them to blow the balloon and tie it tight after which were given a tooth pick each.

Then he said, “Each one of you have a full blown balloon and a tooth pick. Keep your balloon without popping for 5 minutes. The winner shall be the one who keeps his balloon intact… Your time starts now: Three, two, one, go.”

As soon as they heard the whistle of the trainer, each one tried to pop the other one’s balloon. In a minute all the balloons were burst.  The final whistle blew and the trainer asked, “Does anyone have the balloon intact?” The answer was in unison, “No!”

“What did I tell you before the game started?”

“To keep our balloons intact.”

 “Did I tell you to pop the balloons of others?”

 “No”, was the reply.

The trainer told, “If you listened to what I have said … if no one tried to pop the balloon of others?”

“We could have kept our balloons without popping!”

The trainer posed for a moment and said, “I did not tell you to fail the other for you to succeed. But still you have done it. This is our prejudice. Our bias made us to act more than what was instructed! We think that in order to win ourselves, we have to fail all others… we have to succeed before the other one defeats us…”

Does anyone succeed in the game of life by failing others? No… all of us fail together!”  

He continued, “All of us must understand this truth. We can be real winners only when others also win along with us. Alone we are a drop, whereas, together we can be an ocean; alone we are a thread, but together we can be a rope; alone we are a sheet of paper, but bound together, we can be a book. ”

To end this post may I quote a famous saying in the ecumenical circles, “Let us hang together or hang separately!”  

WHAT ARE YOU: A POTATO, EGG OR COFFEE BEAN?

Once upon a time a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn’t know how she was going to make it. She was tired of fighting and struggling all the time. It seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.

Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter.

The daughter impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in another bowl. He then poured the coffee into a cup and added sugar to it.

Turning to her, he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?” “Potatoes, eggs and coffee,” she replied.

“Look closer”, he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noted that they were soft.

He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a smile to her face.

“Father, what does this mean?” she asked. He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity-the boiling water. However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.

The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.

However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.

“Which one are you?” he asked his daughter. “When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

In life, things happen around us and things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you choose to react to it and what you make out of it. Life is all about learning, adopting and converting all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

LET YOUR WORDS HEAL AND NOT WOUND

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was near the only window in the room and the other was flat on his back because of his illness. They talked for hours together since they did not have anything else to do. They spoke about their families, their jobs, their social and financial matters. 

The man in the bed by the window could sit up once a while and he described everything that happened outside the window. He spoke vividly about the park outside with a stream running through, people enjoying in the garden, swans swimming in the water, the children playing in the park and so many other exciting things that was happening each day. The man in the other bed longed to hear the narrative. The description was such lively that he closed his eyes and started to see the things as the narration went on.  It instilled in him a thirst to live longer.   

Days and weeks passed. One morning, the nurse on that day’s duty came to see that the man near the window died peacefully.    She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch and, after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the world outside. Finally, he would have the joy of seeing it for himself! He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.

It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, “Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.”

Learn to encourage someone always in spite of your personal difficulties. Take time to care others in spite of your handicaps.  Let your words heal and not wound. Learn to emit positive energy around you!

BELIEVE IN WORK AND NOT IN LUCK

As day go by, people look for short-cuts to ‘succeed’ in life. The increase of ‘god-men and women’ in all religions prove it. It is a paradox that even the established religions whose Scriptural teachings are vehemently against the practices that promote false expressions of faith and exploitation of weak people have become manipulative.  (I do not want to narrate the dubious tricks and gimmicks they use to make-believe the vulnerable people). It is a sad fact that many have made religion and vulnerability of the wavering human mind a mockery.   

Someone has put it in the following words “Bill Gates never did Laxmi pooja, but he is the richest man. Albert Einstein never did Saraswati pooja, but he was the most intelligent man. Their mantra was their love for their work, not luck.” I would add to it that there so many people who do not bow before kurissadi (a tower like structure that keeps offertory chests to collect from the devotees) or put their offerings, but they are blessed. There are so many who do not go for pilgrimage, but are growing in their business. There are thousands of people who do not rely on the ‘divine’ to achieve what they want; but they have achieved and still achieving through hard work and intelligence.

Believe in WORK and not in LUCK. Trust God but don’t be over-dependent on him. As Ignatius of Loyola had said “pray as if everything depends on God, work as if everything depends on you.”  God should become the Alpha and the Omega in our lives.  Alpha and Omega becomes relevant only when the other alphabets play their role.  

Let us remember:

The Best “om” is home!

The Best “age” is courage!

The Best “mile” is smile!

The Best “stand” is understand!

The Best “end” is friend!

The Best “day” is today!

THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS IS …

Paul Coelho in “The Alchemist” gives this meaningful story:

A certain shopkeeper sent his son to learn about the secret of happiness from the wisest man in the world. The lad wandered through the desert for 40 days, and finally came upon a beautiful castle, high atop a mountain. It was there that the wise man lived.

Rather than finding a saintly man, though, our hero, on entering the main room of the castle, saw a hive of activity: tradesmen came and went, people were conversing in the corners, a small orchestra was playing soft music, and there was a table covered with platters of the most delicious food in that part of the world. The wise man conversed with everyone, and the boy had to wait for two hours before it was his turn to be given the man’s attention.

The wise man listened attentively to the boy’s explanation of why he had come, but told him that he didn’t have time just then to explain the secret of happiness. He suggested that the boy look around the palace and return in two hours.

“Meanwhile, I want to ask you to do something”, said the wise man, handing the boy a teaspoon that held two drops of oil. “As you wander around, carry this spoon with you without allowing the oil to spill”.

The boy began climbing and descending the many stairways of the palace, keeping his eyes fixed on the spoon. After two hours, he returned to the room where the wise man was.

“Well”, asked the wise man, “Did you see the Persian tapestries that are hanging in my dining hall? Did you see the garden that it took the master gardener ten years to create? Did you notice the beautiful parchments in my library?”

The boy was embarrassed, and confessed that he had observed nothing. His only concern had been not to spill the oil that the wise man had entrusted to him.

“Then go back and observe the marvels of my world”, said the wise man. “You cannot trust a man if you don’t know his house”.

Relieved, the boy picked up the spoon and returned to his exploration of the palace, this time observing all of the works of art on the ceilings and the walls. He saw the gardens, the mountains all around him, the beauty of the flowers, and the taste with which everything had been selected. Upon returning to the wise man, he related in detail everything he had seen.

“But where are the drops of oil I entrusted to you?” asked the wise man. Looking down at the spoon he held, the boy saw that the oil was gone.

“Well, there is only one piece of advice I can give you”, said the wisest of wise men. “The secret of happiness is to see all the marvels of the world and never to forget the drops of oil on the spoon”.

WE ARE BLESSED NOT ONLY BECAUSE WE PRAYED…!

Are we thinking that it is our prayers that bring blessings in our lives? It need not be so. It can be the prayers of others as well! Are our prayers selfish?

A voyaging ship was wrecked during a storm at sea and only two of the men on it were able to swim to a small, desert like island. The two survivors (let us name them Tom & Jo) decided to pray. However, to find out whose prayer was more powerful, they agreed to divide the territory between them and stay on opposite sides of the island.

The first thing they prayed for was food. The next morning, Tom saw a fruit-bearing tree on his side of the land, and he was able to eat its fruit. Jo's parcel of land remained barren.

After a week, both were lonely and they decided to pray for a wife. The next day, there was a woman who swam to Tom’s side of the Land.  On the other side of the island, there was nothing.

Soon Tom prayed for a house, clothes, more food. The next day, like magic, all of them were given to him. However, still Jo had nothing.

Finally, Tom prayed for a ship, so that he and his wife could leave the island. In the morning, he found a ship docked at his side of the island. He boarded the ship with his wife and decided to leave Jo on the island. He considered the other man unworthy to receive God's blessings, since none of his prayers had been answered.

As the ship was about to leave, Tom heard a voice from heaven booming, "Why are you leaving your companion on the island?"

"My blessings are mine alone, since I was the one who prayed for them," the first man answered. "His prayers were all unanswered and so he does not deserve anything."

"You are mistaken!" the voice rebuked him. "He had only one prayer, which I answered. If not for that, you would not have received any of my blessings."

"Tell me," the first man asked the voice, "what did he pray for that I should owe him anything?"

"He prayed that all your prayers be answered."

We should be aware that our blessings are not the fruits of our prayers alone, but those of others praying for us.

Let us become interceders. My prayer for you today is that all your prayers are answered. Be blessed.

"What you do for others is more important than what you do for yourself"

LET’S PRAY FOR EACH OTHER. 

WHAT ARE YOU?

You must have heard “What you are is a gift from God and what you become is a gift to God”. Jesus Christ, in one of his parables, speaks about a master giving three servants talents as per their ability and commanding them to report when he returns (Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-29). The folly of the servant who was given one talent was that he feared the master and buried it.

The people in the world can be categorized into two: Historical people and Historic people.  The historical people are those who are born into this world and because they are born, they live and they live till they die.  With their death, everything vanishes into thin air.  Nothing good or creative is done by them to be left behind for the others to remember.  They are a procreative majority.  They do not leave behind any legacy for the generations to be proud of him/her. All their contribution is that they produce children – in most cases lazy and non-productive generations. 

But the historic people are those who hold the view that they have something to contribute for the generations to come.  They live a purposeful and full life.  They may be a minority but can be classified as the creative minority.  It is this creative minority that has created history. May I bring to your attention again a couple of categorizations of Jesus Christ about his disciples – salt of the earth and leaven in the dough! Though salt and leaven are a minority in the food items, its presence is felt by all who taste it. 

I wish to caution you that you should become historic in the above sense and not in the ways used by many so-called ‘leaders’.  I think it is worthwhile to mention the dubious ways of the so-called ‘leaders’ in the present day world.  Some develop a clout by inducing and seducing the followers who sing ‘hosanna’ to them. Some are autocratic in their behavior (I feel that they are the most insecure people and by becoming autocratic they camouflage their inferiority complex. It can be categorized as ‘Hitler complex’).  Some make their own memorials in the name of jubilees (they fear that after their death no one is going to do it!), contribution of money to the community and the name being published (a recent trend seen is that the public servants using the funds allocated from the Government exchequer and exhibiting their photos and names (flex culture!) with the mention that they have contributed to the project - as if they brought money from their homes!).  The list of ways of becoming ‘historic’ goes on and new patterns are being probed and executed these days! 

I am not writing here about ‘becoming’ historic; but ‘being’ historic. You are to be historic by letting your presence felt through selfless love and concern for others. More than producing the next generations, historic people contribute something for the community they live in.  It is without expecting anything in return (but at the same time they shall be remembered by many).  

Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing. When you face difficult times, know that challenges are not sent to destroy you. They're sent to PROMOTE, INCREASE and STRENGTHEN you.  

Let us be historic in its true sense.

(This post is a slightly changed one from the post on 9^th December 2014)